Clever Facebook Status

Typing a long text to your crush with your true feelings but then erasing it and typing… Yeah. Ever Happened?

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

I can drive you crazy without a drivers license.

The best nicknames are usually the ones people don’t know they have.

The longest five minutes are the last five minutes of a lecture while the shortest five minutes are the last five minutes of an exam.

Some people are perfect in being *FAKE* then being *REAL*.

Just wondering why brain cells die, skin cells die, your hair follicle die, but fat cells live FOREVER?

HUMAN BRAIN: Forgets what we want to remember & remembers what we want to forget.

I have to admit, God was just showing off when he created me.

Kids born in 2000 never have to worry about forgetting how old they are.

Some people might be less attractive but once you get to know them they are hot as hell.

Thanks to all those who ask the awkward questions on yahoo answers so that we don’t have to.

Laziness is the mother of all bad habbits but ultimately she is a MOTHER and we should respect her.

I wish I could google the things I have misplaced.

I need a lifetime lover, not a night time lover.

ADMIT IT: Life would be so boring without me.

Lets learn to ignore selfish people just like the way we ignore Terms & conditions of any software.

An empty web browsing history is a sure sign of pure guilt. ;)

About 90% of the high scores in mobile games are made either in the toilet or in a lecture or while preparing for exams.

You want to come in my life, the door is open. You want to get out of my life, the door is open. Just one request. Don’t stand at the door, you are blocking the traffic.

If APPLE made a car, would it have windows?

Hearts know things that the eyes don’t see and feels things that the mind cannot understand.

Never be fooled by what you see on the outside, b’coz on the inside it’s often a different story.

You see a person’s true colors when you are no longer beneficial to their life.

Plese don’t talk to me, I get attached too easily.

LOVE is when I can’t pay attention in class because Im too busy writing her first name with my last name.

Finding friends with the same mental disorder as you …….. Priceless :)

Money can’t buy friends but you can get a better class of enemy.

The only math I can remember is that …. You + Me = Forever

I wish my phone never ran out of battery, my fridge never ran out of food and my wallet never ran out of money.

STUDY? The act of texting, eating and watching TV with an open textbook nearby.

GIRL: Describe me in 1 word. —- BOY: Mine ;)

Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me … I’ll

Cheating is easy …. try something more challenging … like being faithful.

People wanna see you doing well but not better than them :)

When I close my eyes, I see you …. when I open my eyes, I miss you.

My Girl = My Life …. Touch Her = Your Last Day On Earth.

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.

No matter how full my wardrobe is, I never seem to find anything to wear.

Sometimes no matter how much you want things to happen, all you can do is wait.