Facebook Jokes

Brighten the day of your friends by posting new facebook jokes every day. Jokes are for making every one laugh with you. Get the funniest facebook jokes of all times and share with friends on this platform. If you are in humorous mood then also make your friends smile by sharing funny facebook pranks with them. Here you will find the cool and unique facebook jokes status.

When your GF blocks u on facebook…… Its called an electronic divorce :)

If people could see the face I make when I read their facebook status updates, they would probably unfriend me.

I love it when someone’s laugh is funnier than the joke.

Brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. :)

Doctors finally figured out whats wrong with a girls brain; on the left side, there’s nothing right; and on the right side, there’s nothing left.

We are the WTF generation: Wikipedia, Twitter and Facebook.

It’s not true that I had nothing ON….. The radio was ON. :)

There are two types of human beings found on Facebook. One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men.

I hate when skinny girls say,”omg I’m so fat”. If you are fat does that make me a whale?

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life, if I die next Tuesday.

The real reason women live longer than men b’coz they don’t have to live with women.

Don’t do it in the Garden, they say love is blind but ur neighbor ain’t. :)

Job interview: Please tell us why you’d love to work for us? ME: I need money :)

I wonder what happens when doctor’s wife eats an apple a day. :)

Dear Google: They are only using you to get to me. Sincerely Wikipedia

I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them.

How to make a woman go mmmmmmm all nite long? …………………….. with Duct Tape :)

Is it rude to throw a breath mint in someone’s mouth while they are talking?

FACT: Kissing burns 5.4 calories a minute…… Ummm, wanna work out?

Whatever you do always give 100% ….. Unless you are donating blood :)

I’m not weird. I’m limited edition.

I never let my best friend do stupid things … alone.

We are best friends. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up …….. after I finish laughing :)

I did in the bed. I did it on the couch. I did it in the car. Texting is such an obsession. :)

Brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat. The government hates competition.

How to sleep faster: Decorate your bedroom to look like a classroom.

Dear parents, we know money doesn’t grow on trees, that’s why we are asking you for it.

I’m not stalker. I am an unpaid private investigator.

I have a date tonight, with my bed. We are totally gonna sleep together.

Instead of single as a marital status, it should read independently, owned and operated :)

Congratulations … You are the 100th person to view my status. To see your prize please click Control + W.

Viagra is now available in powder form to put in your tea. It does not enhance your performance but it does stop your biscuit going soft. Lolz

I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday :)

Laughing is the best medicine but if you are laughing for no reason, you need medicine.

Question of the Day: When you wait for a waiter in a restaurant, aren’t you a waiter?

Death is God’s way of saying you are fired. Suicide is humans way of saying, I quit.

My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. Lolz

There are only two kinds of people in this world: Doctors and Patients :)